Respecting Our Elderly
(Proverbs
30:11 KJV)There is a generation that curseth their father, and
doth not bless their mother.
Over
the years I have noticed that one way many children disrespect their ageing
parents is by avoiding them as much as possible. When they are around them it
seems as though it is more of a chore than a pleasure.
One
reason for such behavior could be the result of doting parents, which usually
means the children grow up without established boundaries or rules. When this happens,
the Adamic nature in a child begins to develop on its own and the result is usually
selfishness.
A
selfish person only likes to think of themselves; therefore spending time with
aged parents does not fit into their self-pleasure.
Another
possible reason for such behavior is when a child is brought up in a home where
one or both parents are driven by an angry religious spirit. This is the worst
kind of home to be brought up in, because the child sees God through the same rose
colored glasses as they see their parents. This usually means that the parents
do not like themselves, so they take it out on the child, but then they put on
their angelic smile when they are in church.
The
result of the first example is why the child does not like to spend time with
their elderly parents. The result of the second example is why the child does
not like to spend time with God.
In
either case it seems that when the “once strong parents” become weak and needy,
they repel the very ones who were once magnetically drawn to them, such as
their children.
However,
I am happy to say that the above two examples are hopefully in the minority and
not the majority. There is nothing more heartwarming than to see a child love
and show respect for their aging parents or grandparents, even though sometimes
it may be difficult.
It
is easy to love and care for a little baby who is totally dependent on you.
However, it is much harder to love and care for a “once strong independent hill-
taker type person” who has grown old and weak and is as needy as a little baby.
I realize that sometimes it is difficult for one to get their mind around such
a change in a person’s life.
I
personally enjoy learning practical lessons from those who set good examples.
The best example of loving and caring for aging parents and grandparents was set
by my dear friends, Dan and Gayle Haas. Dan and Gayle not only had their
youngest daughter still living at home, but Gayle’s father and grandmother
lived with them as well.
Typically,
when someone else is in your home there is an obvious difference in the atmosphere,
even though they all love each other and get along. However, this case was
different. There was not a difference in the atmosphere and they all enjoyed
themselves as one large complete family. Gayle’s father and grandmother never
seemed to feel they were intruding...and the rest of the family did not act as
if they were intruding either.
I
intently watched and was amazed by the care and respect Dan and Gayle’s
wonderful family showed to both her father and grandmother until they went home
to be with the Lord.
This
combined family actually reminded me of an old television show called the “Walton's.”
Even though Dan and Gayle had four
generations living in their home at one time, they were committed to each other
and bound by the God-kind of love.
I
am always reminded of the way it should be done when I drive past a nursing
home and realize that many of those old folks are basically forgotten and the
children are waiting for them to die.
Father,
Help
us not to respond as those in the first two examples by openly showing
disrespect for our elderly loved ones. Help us to give them the love and peace
as their life is coming to an end as they gave to us as our life and future was
beginning. Father, we want to be just like You in sowing grace and love.
Amen